Having problems with software delivery?
Quality is less than ideal?
Business doesn’t talk with IT?
I’m sure IT doesn’t even talk with IT!
Am I right?!
Don’t diddle daddle with annoying coaches and expensive training. ALL you need to do is stick our Scrum – Easy Install® CD in your computer and press GO. In just a few easy steps, you’ll be on your way to Agile heaven!
With our Scrum Easy Install®, you get…
- The secret recipe to instantly create high performing teams
- All the Agile engineering practices you can muster
- The step by step process and tools to build working software every 4 weeks
- The patented yoga induced therapy to rid your managers of that nasty muscle memory
- The automatic and always available Product Owner Selector®
- The Project Manager to ScrumMaster Evolutionator®
- The newly improved Conflict Resolutionner Package®
- The Let’s Talk® conversation creator
- and the always popular…Silver Bullet On-time-On-budget Product Delivery System®
But wait! With Scrum Easy Install®, you also get :
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Waldo® will ask you those tough questions, like…



Eric, you are very funny today
When you release the alpha ?
I want it
Thanks!
I hope you had as much fun reading it as I did writing it
Excellent!
Now… where do I order!
Martin,
Simply close you eyes, tap your heels together three times and the UPS guy will be at your door.
Thanks for the comment!
Funniest thing I read in a long time
Unfortunately, also the viewpoint of the majority of the people at my place about Scrum…
Hi Eric,
Thanks for the comment!
Invite some co-workers to read this post. Sometimes, sarcasm goes a long way
Cheers!
I closed my eyes and tapped my heels 3 x – no delivery – *sigh* Is customer satisfaction guarantee covered by the product?
The talking stick arrived! It meows … I’d prefer it to bark – could you add that to your backlog?
Hi Samantha,
Thanks for the comment!
Ok…We are about to add :
As a [...], I want the Talking Stick to bark in order to [...] ?
You’ll need to fill in the blanks before we prioritize it
Cheers!
Wow, I call it working software , Eric. I want it , Can we add the Lean Extension to this? LooL. it’s really good article , because some of my customers want something like that. I’m going to create Agile pill for organizations.
Regards
Thanks for the comment Asad!
Cheers!
Awesome! How do I become a reseller for this amazing product.
ps: This product really needs a TV-Shopping-Channel commercial.
The Slap-Chop guy would be perfect!
Thanks for the comment Rudi!
Thanks for sharing!
Question: Does the Sprint Extender support an infinite duration?
Also, I couldn’t see anything about Automated Continuous Improvement or a Random Retrospectives Report Generator . Do you have something that does the same thing? My customer does not want to worry about that..